Truth #21
"Metallica isn't cool anymore? Def Leppard either? Sorry kids, I know my music isn't cool, even though I pretend I think it is.
Everyone should get a chance to be cooler than their parents. Here's yours.
p.s. I steal your ipod and jam to your music when you're at school!"
Submitted 7/4/07 via e-mail
Thursday, July 5, 2007
Truth: Have sex, girl!
Truth #20
"I want my daughter to experience sex and live with someone before she gets married, but I tell her she should stay a virgin because that's what our church tells me to tell her. I hope she disobeys me and the church and has a lot of fun doing it."
Submitted 7/4/07 via e-mail
"I want my daughter to experience sex and live with someone before she gets married, but I tell her she should stay a virgin because that's what our church tells me to tell her. I hope she disobeys me and the church and has a lot of fun doing it."
Submitted 7/4/07 via e-mail
Truth: I live through you
Truth #19
"I envy you, daughter. You are pretty and popular and have lots of friends and guys who are interested in you. I never had any of those things when I was young, and I've done my best to make you popular and likable -- it will make your life these next years so much easier. At night I imagine what it must be like to be you, and I replace my childhood memories with my visions of your life."
Submitted 7/4/07 via e-mail
"I envy you, daughter. You are pretty and popular and have lots of friends and guys who are interested in you. I never had any of those things when I was young, and I've done my best to make you popular and likable -- it will make your life these next years so much easier. At night I imagine what it must be like to be you, and I replace my childhood memories with my visions of your life."
Submitted 7/4/07 via e-mail
Wednesday, July 4, 2007
Truth: The biggest mistake of my life
Truth #18
"I spent so much time telling my children to 'leave Mommy alone' and 'go play' and 'no' that now they never even bother to seek me out anymore.
I got just what I wanted -- children who don't bother me and give me my 'me' time.
Not it's just me and my me time..."
Submitted 7/3/04 via e-mail
"I spent so much time telling my children to 'leave Mommy alone' and 'go play' and 'no' that now they never even bother to seek me out anymore.
I got just what I wanted -- children who don't bother me and give me my 'me' time.
Not it's just me and my me time..."
Submitted 7/3/04 via e-mail
Truth: I hate play dates
Truth #17
"Why does sitting around with our children mean that we have to talk about nothing but children? And their eating habits? And their pooping/peeing habits? And their discipline problems? Don't you mothers have anything else you want to discuss? I spend every minute of most play dates thinking about all the other things I'd like to be doing."
Submitted 7/3/07 via e-mail
"Why does sitting around with our children mean that we have to talk about nothing but children? And their eating habits? And their pooping/peeing habits? And their discipline problems? Don't you mothers have anything else you want to discuss? I spend every minute of most play dates thinking about all the other things I'd like to be doing."
Submitted 7/3/07 via e-mail
Tuesday, July 3, 2007
Truth: Yes, it's bad for you
Truth #16
"I hate fast food. I know it makes people fat. I know it's got all sorts of icky ingredients, but damnit, some nights it's just so easy to push all that aside and pull up and order 3 Happy Meals. Kids are happy. Mom is happy. I'm sorry if it takes years off your life."
Submitted 7/1/07
"I hate fast food. I know it makes people fat. I know it's got all sorts of icky ingredients, but damnit, some nights it's just so easy to push all that aside and pull up and order 3 Happy Meals. Kids are happy. Mom is happy. I'm sorry if it takes years off your life."
Submitted 7/1/07
Truth: I wish I never had you
Truth #15
"I had my third child to 'save our marriage.' He's 10. My second child just moved out of the house after graduating high school. I hate myself for it, but I wish we'd never had the third one. I'd be free now."
Submitted 7/1/07
"I had my third child to 'save our marriage.' He's 10. My second child just moved out of the house after graduating high school. I hate myself for it, but I wish we'd never had the third one. I'd be free now."
Submitted 7/1/07
Sunday, July 1, 2007
Truth: Mine's the stinky one!
Truth #14
"Yes, I know my son's dirty diaper needs changing. But I'm having too much fun sitting here at the park chatting with my friends to get up, walk to the car, and change him right now. When he comes over here, we just pretend that we don't smell anything, and when he comes near you and you wrinkle your nose, we pretend you don't exist. Go ahead. Throw me another dirty look. A little poop never hurt anyone."
Submitted 6/30/07 via e-mail
"Yes, I know my son's dirty diaper needs changing. But I'm having too much fun sitting here at the park chatting with my friends to get up, walk to the car, and change him right now. When he comes over here, we just pretend that we don't smell anything, and when he comes near you and you wrinkle your nose, we pretend you don't exist. Go ahead. Throw me another dirty look. A little poop never hurt anyone."
Submitted 6/30/07 via e-mail
Truth: Those damn rich moms!
Truth #13
"I am green with envy over rich moms who have nannies and babysitters to deal with the tough moments of parenting. Don't want to deal with the poop? Call the nanny! Need a night out every other night? Call the nanny! Kids have trouble going to sleep? Call the nanny! Kids wake up at 3 am? Call the nanny! If I had just 1/100th of that amount of help around here, how different life would be..."
Submitted 6/30/07 via e-mail
"I am green with envy over rich moms who have nannies and babysitters to deal with the tough moments of parenting. Don't want to deal with the poop? Call the nanny! Need a night out every other night? Call the nanny! Kids have trouble going to sleep? Call the nanny! Kids wake up at 3 am? Call the nanny! If I had just 1/100th of that amount of help around here, how different life would be..."
Submitted 6/30/07 via e-mail
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